A Funny Thing Happened.

I went into a shop recently to buy some breath mints. The shop was in Woking. Far from where I live, I was there for a work thing. I walked into this shop and it appeared empty. No one at the counter, no one on the shop floor. I peered around for a bit and then offered a hesitant,

'Hello?' into the ether. No reply. I tried again 'Is there anyone there?' I heard a shuffling sound coming from the back of the shop and as I looked round I saw a tiny decrepit old Indian woman shuffling toward me.

'What?' She gruffed. She did not look friendly. In fact she glared at me all the way to the counter top. The mints were behind the counter so I asked her for the ones I wanted. She was wearing really thick bi focals and had to get really close to the items to read them. Even then she kept picking up the wrong ones and making this exasperated noise when I asked her to return to get another pack. Eventually through gestures and me practically leaning over the counter to point to what I wanted we finally got to the transaction stage. At which point another customer walked into the shop clutching several sheaves of paper. From the depths of the shop another person emerged, an old man, even older than the woman. Also wearing thick glasses. The man from behind me piped up.

'I’d like to make some copies' he said.

'What?' the old shopkeeper said.

'Some copies?' the guy behind me said.

‘WHAT?’ the old shopkeeper said, straight out of a sixties British sitcom.

‘SOME COPIES’ The customer half bellowed. The old shopkeeper looked at the old woman and said,

'I can't hear a damn word he's saying.' The woman apparently having forgotten I was there said,

'This one neither. Young people, always mumbling’
I left the shop trying to hold in my tears of laughter.